Open Letters - 2012

[sweep]

Dear Glitter,

I looked for a current open letters thread, but couldn't find one. If there is already one, let me know.

I have been missing in action for a long time. I actually just checked, and the last time I posted was over a year ago.

I just wanted to stop in and say I miss you.

I'll try to stick around, and post some more.

Love Always,

Sweep
_________________
be happy for this moment. this moment is your life.

[spiderlady]

Why, hello, sweep!
Actually, I've been MIA too. I need to post more.
How are all the lovely Glitterati?

Love and hugs,
spiderlady
_________________
"Now it has become clear to me, that it cannot be wisdom to assert the truth of one faith over another. The wise man makes justice his guide, and learns from all." --Akbar

[town hall]

Dear brother of mine,

I really don't mind you staying here so you can look for jobs in the city, but you are taking the piss! Just go and talk to the employment agencies! Don't sit in my flat looking at them on the internet - you could do that from home! You didn't wake up till 11 and it is after 12 now, so you only have the afternoon when you should've had the whole day. Meanwhile, it's hard for me to get on with anything. I wish you luck. Now go!

Yours hypocritically,

Older sister
_________________
kittens are cute, but a full-grown cat can be cuter

flickr!
twidder!

[sweep]

Dear School,

I know this is a hard program, and I know I really should be working harder than I am working. But, couldn't you please, please, please let me understand things a tiny bit better than I currently am without any effort on my part. Or a lot better than I currently am.

Thanks,

Sweep
_________________
be happy for this moment. this moment is your life.

[mohawk]

Dear neighbor-
You know how on Saturday there were a bunch of cars at my house, a rare occurrence? And you know how there were a bunch of people in my backyard eating BBQ, playing croquet and pushing around kids in plastic cars? And you know how there were balloons and streamers everywhere? Well those are all clear indications that we were having a party. And it was my daughter's first birthday party. And you know how you decided to go ahead and spend the 2 hours to use your leaf blower in the side yard adjacent to everyone? Well, thank you for ruining the backyard fun for everyone. Jerk. Also, don't use the leaf blower to "amp up" your bonfire. Also, your daughter never brought me my girl scout cookies!!!!
Sincerely,
The person next door who is planning on building a fence
_________________
She believed she could, so she did.

[gemma]

Dear (mostly one person but really it's getting to be everyone on)Facebook,


I just wanted to post what I thought was a hilarious picture of an impossibly tiny bra! I didn't say anything negative about anything, and if you know me well enough to comment on my post, you'd know I have no issues with, well, anyone's boobs, really, and that I was simply confused by what looked like ribbons being used to cover/hoist said boobs. It was just the teeniest strip of fabric I'd ever seen, and I was amused and bewildered and it struck me funny. MUST you use it as a platform for your serial contrariness? I don't think so.

Let me amuse myself while shopping for bras online. Okay?

Ooookay.

[Chiquita]

Dear Developers (who took over the board of my lovely neighborhood association),

You suck!

Instead of me spending a leisurely spring break day off with my kid I have to be at a city council meeting to speak out against a zoning change you are supporting. You guys are more interested in your business than in my home.

Signed,

Person who will speak out today but head to the beach tomorrow.



Dearest new doggy,

If you keep licking my legs I am NEVER going to feed you breakfast and you will have to go wake up Dad, if you can.

- love Mommy (who is typing while sitting on top of her desk so you can't lick her anymore)

[sweep]

Dear Body,

Really? Tonsillitis? Right before this paper is due and right before exams?

I'm going to go to bed very early (like, right now) and when I wake up in the morning, I expect to be feeling a whole lot better.

I'm counting on you to work this out,

Love,

Sweep
_________________
be happy for this moment. this moment is your life.

[daircroi]

Dear my theatre company,

I love you. I love that we, collectively, are the sort of theatre group that would inspire a playwright to write a script specifically for us that is as whacked-out, hilarious, and sweet as the one we read together this morning. Thanks for being the right people.

Love,
Your lighting gal
_________________
And it was messy, but we were drunk. Story of my life, I guess? --oohlala

[rachiepachie]

Dear Eye Department,
Please stop bouncing me around from clinc to clinic and figure out what's worng with me. It's been 6 months. I'm sick of seeing two of everything.
Humpf.
Yours,
The "complex case" girl

ps guy who said it was "to do with my surgery": no shit, sherlock. FIX ME.


Dear sun,
Please stick around! :)
R

Dear Weight Watchers,
I can't believe I signed up to you. Even more, I can't believe I'm sticking with it and its kind of working.
In shock (and gratitude),
Rach

Dear Kitteh,
You are my absolute favourite. I an so glad you came to live with me. It's nice to have company while I'm off work and semi-housebound.
The human who feeds you.

Oh and G*,
I absolutely love the open letters thread. Thanks for the space to vent.
rachiepachie
_________________
go placidly amidst the noise and haste...

[petunia_843]

Dear CoWorkers:
Thanks for being so supportive of my diabetes. On the other hand, please stop the constant comments and observations about my weight. I know it's just me, but I have a real issue in getting too much attention for something I haven't completed yet. I have a shit-ton of weight left to lose and I feel Like I am just getting started. So please pipe down.

Dear Nursing Home:

Please hire me. I would be awesome at representing you to new patients and imparting the rules, regulations and paperwork required for admission. I'm smart, compassionate, and I have a real talent for converying complex regulations into laymans terms. Also, I'm not afraid to talk about money. And I'm great with following up and arranging things. I know it would be a learning curve at first but I think I would be awesome at this job. Please hire me!

Dear Best Friend:

You have been really craqppy in the last few months. You don't return phone calls, and the only way I can see you is to come over to your house and sit around the kitchen table with you while you drink and insensitively offer me alcohol. I have been more than patient and supportive of you. It would be nice to actually go out and do something, and if it's to a bar I can drink diet coke and drive. Please get it together!

[sweep]

Dear Penicillin,

You are magical. Thanks for making me feel better so quickly.

Love,

Sweep
_________________
be happy for this moment. this moment is your life.

[puck]

dear sweep,

seriously, right?

xopuck


dear petunia_843,

i feel like that's totally within the realm of "hey, i don't really feel comfortable with folks commenting on that." maybe?
_________________
xoxpuck
"i'm a little bit pop-culture
and a lot bit d.i.y."
(rawr!)

[Kendaljay]

Dear Sweep,
As someone recovering from strep throat still, I can agree that penicillin really is a magical medicine lol.
Love and feel better!
KJay
_________________
ps- you're my favourite. We should be friends.--e

[sweep]

Dear puck & KJay

Thanks for the love! I feel amazingly better and have almost finished my paper!

Love,

Sweep




Dear penicillin,

If you give me a yeast infection, I will retract my previous statement about your magical powers.

Thank you very much,

Sweep




Dear boy I slept with last weekend,

Please don't forget that I exist while I am trapped in the library for the next three weeks writing exams.

I promise to be WAY more fun after exams are over.

Ok thanks,

Sweep
_________________
be happy for this moment. this moment is your life.