shameless venting for everyone!

[caropop]

I have a zit that is so big that I felt compelled to measure it.

Also, to call a dermatologist. But I measured it first.
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country cookin' makes you good lookin'

it's a blog!

[anniebeegoode]

I think I have a kidney stone.
It hurts.
I drove today with my Kindle on my hood.
I went less than 1/2 a mile before I realized it.
I pulled over.
It was crazy hot. I was in pain. I was hungry.
I limped up and down the street looking for it.
It disappeared.
It should have been there, but it was gone.
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I know it's not real, but lunchboxes
-flight of the conchords

[pony j]

[sibee]

Parental guilt trips are the worst. Especially when they involve giving up your very awesome weekend plans to go to some engagement/pre-wedding dinner with your entire family (who you don't really like all that much) in 100+ degree weather.

Feeling guilty for not wanting to do what you "should" do, is also not fun.
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Wenn's dir nicht gefällt, mach neu.

[milyssa]

Thumper has an eye infection and maybe other upper respiratory stuff. We notice it yesterday and the vet had a spot last night, so he's already got meds. I had to do the eye drop and the liquid antibiotic (oral) alone this morning (A is at work, and it's more reasonable for me to do it alone in the morning rather than get up with him at 5am every day to do it!).

He was good with the eye drop, but really REALLY resisted the oral. It took me several tries to get him wrapped in a bunny burrito, and he snuffled and squirmed and grunted and it just broke my heart.

He seems to have forgiven me really quickly (plus despite knowing I was going to ambush him and wrap him in a towel, he kept coming to me for pineapple haha) so I think he knows it's to help him feel better, and I know he needs it so we can keep him healthy, but he was SO unhappy!

I have given IV saline, insulin shots, and pills to cats (2 different kitties) before, and been just fine, but his unhappiness really made ME unhappy! :( 2 more weeks...

A pointed out (via text) that this is good practice for parenting. I replied that it'll probably break my heart just as much then!
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With all its sham, drudgery, and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world.

[Crumb]

[town hall]

Not so much a vent as a whinge. It's warm here at the moment, and humid. It's making my nail polish bubble, and making me lethargic. I promised brownies to my colleagues tomorrow. I don't want to put the oven on! Wah! And I have to clear up the kitchen before I even begin, because my partner is a flippin lazy git. Oh, and they didn't have macadamias in the shop so I got hazelnuts, and I think my amazing brownies might not be so amazing with hazelnuts.

And, and, I phoned my parents about 50 mins ago and they were eating, so my mum said she'd ring back. She hasn't. I bet she'll ring just as I'm finally getting down to brownie-making.
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kittens are cute, but a full-grown cat can be cuter

flickr!
twidder!

[bookselves]

I've worked 6 days/week for the last five weeks AND now I am working 14 days in a row and I really dislike the job I am at now and I don't feel like I am getting richer.

BOOOOOOOOO.
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"My power doesn't come from other people's lust for my awesome vagina, thanks." - Enzyme

So, I have a blog now.

[Lady_Stardust]

I'm usually indifferent to yarn snobs, but when you drop a skein of acrylic yarn into a bowl of sorbet as I'm asking you if you want it TO MAKE SQUARES FOR CHARITY BLANKETS, that's bullshit.
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Back in the '70s when disco & exorcisms were all the rage, he was the man.

[Aliceinwonderland]

I race mountain bikes almost every weekend and go over crazy technical terrain and climb for hours, all of which led me to believe I'm in great shape.

...but today I put my back out moving a bookshelf and I was supposed to go downhilling tomorrow :( I have a free pass to go and I wanted to go on a weekday before school started so I could have the trails to myself and wouldn't have to battle dudes for my spot. I don't think I could even get my bike on a chairlift tomorrow much less descend down a mountain for an hour or so at a time.

Once my back recovers I'm going to look into back strengthening exercises to help balance out my crazy leg muscles. Any ideas, athlete/yogi types?? I have a hunch that's part of the reason why I strained my back - my leg muscles getting bunchy and forcing them to do things they don't want to do.
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Well, duh, but that's no reason to abandon ship. Work and fix it

Blog: http://elizalives.blogspot.com

[Nemesis]

[milyssa]

[petunia_843]

Well my saga with my best friend continues. I sent her a letter a month ago stating that I couldn't take her behavior anymore in our friendship, and pretty much broke it down for her. She was very hurt and very upset, and sent me a bunch of texts that were pretty self-pitying and reluctant to entertain the idea of change. I waited a while and sent her another letter, this one stating that I realize the first one was a shock and rather harsh, and that I did admit that I felt a bit self righteous, so I invited her to tell me anything she thought I was doing wrong in the friendship, and I told her a few things that were going on with me. That was last week. Yesterday she calls me and leaves me a message that she's ready to talk on the phone. I didn't respond super quickly, so then she starts texting me like crazy. Like 15 texts in a row. I was on the phone with someone else and I began to get a little pissed at the unrelenting texting. Texting is how she prefers to communicate right now - she puts all this emotional stuff in texts, sends like 8 or 9 really wordy texts, and then there might be a back and forth with her saying some very accusatory stuff, like a 7th grade girl might communicate, and we are both 40. So I got off the phone and read the texts. When I was done, I was PISSED. I felt like FUCK YOU. She wasn't even hearing me. Basically, what she had to say is this: 1. It is my fault that I am dissatisfied with the way she has been treating me because I don't understand her disability. 2. She doesn't like that it was always her responisibility to plan all our activities - mind you she's the one with the limitations, the disability and having 2 kids and needing childcare, so I told her I always deferred to her because I perceived her as her being the one that needed to be accomodated, not me, and maybe that was a mistake. 3. I am "exaggerating" that whenever I am around her,, it is all about her and we don't talk about me or what's going on with me, and it's always what she wants to do, all the time every time. 4. She's just not a "plans making" type person and I just have to accept that. 5. If we work this out, she can't take me on a "weekly basis."

I was so pissed. She's basically angry with me for rocking the boat, and puts this on me being too needy and demanding of her. I am not allowed to need or want anything from the friendship, if I ask anything of her, ANYTHING, well, that's being too needy. I told her the weekly basis thing was a JOKE.. I told her that we haven't been that close in years, and I have never expected her to do anything on a weekly or even biweekly basis, and that for the past two years, she has been taking WEEKS to return my calls. I told her that's not okay, and I am not demanding a time table of her at all, but I am asking her to be there for me more than she has been in the past c0uple of years. I also told her that if I was dating a guy that treated me like she has been, for years, she'd tell me exactly what I should do about that. But if I try to assert that I need her to make some changes as my friend, well, I'm being too demanding and needy.

I am super pissed that she brought up her disability and me not being sensitive enough to it as an excuse for some of this. She was in a horrible car accident when she was 19 and had a spinal cord injury. She walks with a limp and has trouble getting around, and is in a lot of pain all the time. She said I hadn't educated myself on what she goes through with a spinal cord injury. Because I told her I was pissed that with my diabetes, which her own father has, when I go over to see her she offers me sugar, alcohol and carbs every tine. So I didn't go into that, which she pretty much skipped over. I told her that she was right, that I couldn't possibly imagine what she goes through with her disability, and I told her that I always remembered that Larry Flynt said of his spinal cord injury that it was like standing in a vat of boiling water while at the same time someone tears at your flesh with a claw hammer. So I told her if she is in anywhere near that much pain, I could understand why she felt so bad and why she needed the occasional Percocet. The thing is, she uses that disability as an excuse to take a lot more than Percocet. She washes that Percocet down with alcohol on a regular basis. And she takes 2 to 3 smoking sessions of marijuana every day with that beer and Percocet. I know that's terrible to say but that is a lot of her reasoning behind her substance abuse.

So I thought about it, and I decided not to reply to her texts again. I don't think this is something that can be expressed and hashed out in a text. So I wrote her another letter, this one pretty brief, one page. I mailed it last night. 3rd letter. I just stated what I stated above. It was pretty hard to come to that decision. I have been friends with her for ten years, and we have known each other since we were born and grew up together. I don't want to completely cut her loose, but I don't see that she's giving me a choice. I am asking 3 things from her - that she return phone calls, make plans, and be present. I don't think that's a hell of a lot to ask. Especially not from someone that says they love you and says what a good friend you've been to them. If I have been that great a friend, then I am worth those three things. And if I am not, then it's time for me to move on, because I feel that's the least ANYONE deserves from their friends.

[daysleeper]

Petunia - that sucks about your friend. You are definitely not asking for too much, its really the basic bottom line friendship requirements.



I feel like I will pay for past mistakes FOR-EVER.

I don't really want to get into the details, but it just sucks.

I feel really trapped and lonely. Last night I hung out with my high school boyfriend again. He's local and available. Not that I didn't know it before, but I really find him intolerable. Its not that he's not nice, its just that everything he says annoys me. I feel bad complaining, but I have no one else to tell... I can't complain to my ex because he'll just be all logical and shit and say, "well, if you can't stand him, why are you hanging out with him?" Sometimes he's ok, most of the time he's ok, but then the rest of the time he just goes on and on and on about nothing. I was trying to talk about something that was really bothering me, and he just kept talking over me. He falls into a category I like to call, "blinded by positive thinking." I respect that, I wish I suffered the same affliction rather than my "paralyzed by negative thinking" syndrome.

I'm always worried, always on edge. I can't just say, "screw it" and I wish that I could. I guess I can't because thats what I used to do.... see opening line of my post.

And today I'm trying to work 11 hours, and I really don't have anything to do. I can't justify overtime if I don't even have enough to do in my straight time. FUCK!
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Truth is, everybody is going to hurt you; you just gotta find the ones worth suffering for." -Bob Marley

Blog!

[petunia_843]

Hey daysleeper, I'm sorry you're going through the shit. High school boyfriends SUCK. Mine does. He tracked me down (on Glitter) years ago, kind of internet stalked me, and then when he found a picture of me online where I was 100 pounds heavier than what I was in high school, he stopped talking to me. He is a DOUCHE. Yours doesn't sound like a douche, he just sounds annoying as fuck. It's easy to feel guilty when you can't stand being around someone not because they are a dick, have issues with being mean or anything, they just have a sucky, annoying personality. Don't feel guilty. You deserve a man that makes you feel connected when you're with him, like you feel that "click" and you feel the way you need to feel when you're with him. Keep plugging away! I feel like getting a man is kind of like getting a job - sometimes you have to send out a shitload of resumes, sometimes you have to wait a long time for promising new openings to come up, sometimes you have to be open to someone contacting you out of the blue, and sometimes going through all that is miserable because you hate your current job (man you're currently with) or you can't pay your emotional bills because you have been without a "job" for a long time. Am I making any sense? Fuck it, you will eventualy find a great dude that doesn't annoy you.